otak sepi, hati sepi, diri hampa, terpaksa! haha

I can't fight this feeling any longer
And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow
What started out as friendship has grown stronger
I only wish I had the strength to let it show

I tell myself that I can't hold out forever
I say there is no reason for my fear
'Coz I feel so secure when we're together
You give my life direction, you make everything so clear

And ever as I wander I'm keeping you in sight
You're a candle in the window on a cold dark winter's night
And I'm getting closer than I every thought I might

No I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I've started fighting for
It's time to bring this ship into the shore
And throw away the oars forever

No I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I've started fighting for
And if I have to crawl upon the floor
Or come crashing through your door
Baby I can't fight this feeling anymore

My life has been such a whirlwind since I saw you
I've been runnin' round in circles in my mind
And it always seems that I'm following you girl
'Cause you take me to the places that alone I'd never find

And ever as I wander I'm keeping you in sight
You're a candle in the window on a cold dark winter's night
And I'm getting closer than I every thought I might

And I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I've started fighting for
It's time to bring this ship into the shore
And throw away the oars forever

No I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I've started fighting for
And if I have to crawl upon the floor
Or come crashing through your door
Baby I can't fight this feeling anymore

yeaa ni lagu sesuai sih, haha
gimana yah, apa yah, ah gue bingung,
rasanya ngga jadi diri sendiri nih lagi jatuh cintrong!
kebanyakan munafiknya nih gue, ckck

udah banyak yang gue keluarin statment2 tentang perasaan gue,
misalnya aja pas gue ngobrol sama umi,

"lagi males mi ketemu -msm-"
"lah, emang kenapa?"
"dia bikin kacau aja, kalo ketemu dia kacau dah pokoknya, ngga enak"

hihihi jujur amat, pasti umi mikir gue anak yang polos dan baik, HAHAHA

terus pas temen gue nanya, "eh lo masih suka ga si sama -msm-?"
"hmm... (gue nunjukin jam di tangan gue yang menunjuk angka 4)... jam 3 sampe jam 5 lagi ngga suka, mungkin ntar abis magrib suka lagi"

yaa itu jawaban yang spontan aja, emang itu yang keluar dari hati dan pikiran.

gue emang berusaha ikhlas,
yang gue khawatirin bukannya ikhlas tapi malah menekan masalah ke alam bawah sadar, istilahnya kayak cuma ngesave masalah yang ngga dituntasin dengan ikhlas.

suatu hari bakal melukai hari-hari gue di depan,

astagfirullah..

ya Allah, dia indah banget, mubazir kalo diperlakuin dengan main-main, hahaha

udah lah terserah Allah aja mau kemana dan gimana, ikhlas insya Allah